I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
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