but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
