I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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