Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
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