He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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