day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
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