My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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