I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
