Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
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