So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
