I bet he comes in French.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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