he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
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