First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Randomize
