Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
You made out with two different species that night
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
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