She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Randomize
