Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
kristin has been a bad kristin
He uses pillows to masturbate.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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