i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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