For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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