what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
