OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
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