This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
