She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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