Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
