You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I forgot how hot balto sounded
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
