Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
