we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Randomize
