Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I just found puke in my bra..
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
