dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
