also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
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