Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
