wakey wakey hands off snakey
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
