i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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