Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
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