Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
