i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
Randomize
