she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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