I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
