You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
