I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
