sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize