You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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