Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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