Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
