yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
