Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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