it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Randomize
