Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
What's dad's email?
[email protected]
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize
