An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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