i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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