paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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